I swear. Mental instability must rule at this house or something. Today's fight brought to you by... gee, I was only eating lunch.

Scene: The dining room/kitchen.
JENNIFER is sitting at the table eating a chicken salad, leftover from last night
CHRIS is in the kitchen, warming up chili for lunch.
JENNIFER has come downstairs because CHRIS said he was ready to clean the kitchen, but they've both decided to eat lunch first.

CHRIS: "Are you going to go to the grocery today? I need milk, and we need juice."
JENNIFER: "Am I going by myself?"
C: "Do you want me to come with you?"
J: "You don't have to."
C: "That's not what I asked. Answer the question."
J (puzzled): "I did answer the question."
C: "No you didn't. You answered it with a question, like you always do."
J: "No, I said, "You don't have to."
C: "Leaving it up to me. That's not what I asked."
J: "You asked, "Do you want me to come with you?" I said, "You don't have to." How is that not answering your question?"
C: "Are you stupid? That's not the answer to the question!"
J: "How is that not the answer? I said you didn't have to. It's not a big deal."
C: "You must be stupid. You can't even answer a simple question."
J: "Chris, is this such a big deal? I can go to the grocery by myself. No big deal. You're not even dressed, anyway."
C: "Why don't you just leave?"
J: (still puzzled) "Huh?"
C: "You're not trying very hard if you can't answer a simple question."
J: "I answered the question!"
C: "No you didn't. You don't have a problem. It's all my fault."
J: (thinks, well, yeah...) "Fine. The answer to your question is no."
C: "Can't even answer a stupid question... Why don't you leave now? Pack a bag and leave."
J: "I thought we were going to give this counseling thing six months."
C: "You're not trying very hard. And you don't have a problem, remember?"
J: "How am I not trying? I've purposely included you in things. I've made a point not to make you feel ignored."
C: "No you haven't."
J: "What the answer to that question such a big deal?!?"
C: "You still haven't answered it."
J: "Yes, I did. I said No."
C: "No you didn't."
J: "Well, then, no."
C: "It's too late now. Leave. Go get a one bedroom apartment and pack your shit up and leave."
J: "I thought we had agreed to give the counseling six months. I haven't mentioned leaving since then... why do you keep bringing it up?"
C: "You're not trying. You're not compromising."

So he goes upstairs and takes the QuickPad, after I tell him I would kill him if he erased F&W. Then he shuts down the computer, tells me I can't use it anymore, and then says that if I do leave, he won't let me back inside.

J: "Chris, what brought this on?"
C: "You were acting like an asshole. Now I'm acting like an asshole."
J: "In what way was I acting like an asshole?"
C: "You wouldn't answer my question."
J: "Was it that big of a deal? It's just the grocery. What brough this on?"
C: "Just leave. I don't want to talk to you anymore. I don't want to look at you anymore."
J: "I wish you'd make up your mind. You keep telling me, "Leave, don't leave, leave, don't leave..."
C: "Just leave."
J: "So you can destroy my computer?"
C: "I'm going to do it anyway."
J: "Then I'll just wait right here. I'd rather be present."
C: "Just leave me alone."
J: "I want you to think about why that question was so important. You weren't mad at me ten minutes ago."
C: "Leave me alone. Go upstairs and sit on your ass in front of the computer. You've been doing that all day anyway."
J: "Actually, the next thing on my list was auctions."
C: "Fine, then. Go post your auctions. Make your money, then get out."
J: "Okay, fine."

I quit. I'm not even going to try to understand the motivations behind Mr. Pissy's anger anymore. I don't even think he knows them.

More auctions, coming up. Some CDs this time. Stay tuned for Part 2 of MY LIFE, the SOAP OPERA! Coming soon to a blog near you...

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