I feel like a used car salesman. "Everything Must Go! Rock Bottom Prices! You only have until 1:30pm (or thereabouts) EST to get in on this death-defying deal! Hurry, before it's too late!"

I would never make a good used car salesman. I'd be like, "Oh, do you like that one? Cool. I'm not fond of the color, myself, but hey, whatever rocks your boat..."

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